
| Gàidhlig (Scottish Gaelic) Swearing | English Translation |
Tha thu 'nad luid | Slut |
| S e Luid a th'annad | Slut |
| Co-sheòrsach (adj) | Gay/lesbian |
| Co-sheòrsach (masc) | Gay/lesbian person |
| Gille-tòin | Gay bloke' (colloq.) |
| Banas-feise | Lesbianism |
| Co-sheòrsachd | Homosexuality (gay & lesbian) |
| Cleamhnas lom (masc) | Unprotected sex |
| Iarr muin | To want a shag |
| Air muin ri | Shagging |
| Làir | A good shag (woman) |
| Dàirich | To fuck (*very* crass term) |
| Ith bod | To give a blowjob' (colloq.) |
| Obair-shèididh (fem) | Blowjob |
| Piseag (fem) | Cunt |
| Iasg mò do bhriogais | One eye trouser snake |
| Mac an éisg | Cum, sperm |
| Pitean (masc) | A fanny |
| Ith pitean | To eat fanny |
| Smuasaich bod | To deep throat |
| Deoghail bod | To suck dick |
| Fearchas (masc) | Manhood |
| Breall (masc) | Glans penis |
| Burralaich | To play rough |
| Imlich sine | To lick a nipple |
| Seasamh-boid (masc) | A hard-on |
| Tha cliathagan | |
| Cìochan corrach | Pointy breasts |
| Beul-maothain | Cleavage |
| Imlich mo fhaighean | Lick my cunt |
| Tha thu 'nad fhaighean | You're a cunt |
| S e faighean a th'annad | You're a cunt |
| Gabhaidh e e 'sa thoin/anns a' thoin | He takes it up the ass |
| Ithidh i strailleanan | She's a pussy-eater (lit. She eats Rugs) |
| Ith mo chac | Eat my shit |
| Sugh mo bhod | Suck on my Dick |
| Aireamh na h-Aoine ort | Damn you! |
| Bigealais | Penis, dick, cock |
| Crann | Penis, dick, cock |
| Crom-odhar | Penis, dick, cock |
| Cliospairneach | Penis, dick, cock |
| Cluigean | Penis, dick, cock |
| Gogan | Penis, dick, cock |
| Bod | Penis, dick, cock |
| Blaigeard | Bastard, cunt |
| Trusdar | Bastard, cunt |
| Broilleach | Bosom, tits |
| Uchd | Bosom, tits |
| Brillean | Clitoris |
| Billean | (Pussy) lips |
| Beacharn | Whore |
| Siursach | Whore |
| Striopach | Whore |
| Comhstach | Whore |
| Druis | Whore |
| Bruchag | Slut |
| Baobh | Bitch, old bag |
| Bugair | Bugger |
| Brod | Masturbate |
| Cach | Shit, excrement |
| Caoch | Shit, excrement |
| Cioch | Breast, tit |
| Ciochean | Breasts, tits |
| Caochan | Sheep shit |
| Cum do theanga ablaich gun fheum | Shut up you idiot |
| Co-sheorsach | Homosexual |
| De do ghnothaich! | Mind your own business! |
| Duille | Vagina (lit. leaf) |
| Druisealachd | Randiness, nymphomania |
| Druisear | Pimp, whoremonger |
| Druiseil | Randy, horny |
| Druisire | Lecher |
| Sean-dhruisire | Dirty old man |
| Deanaibh mi gu cruaidh! | Do me hard! |
| Duin do ghob | Shut your mouth |
| Faighean | Vagina |
| faigh muin | Fuck |
| Rach-air-muin | Fuck |
| Fearas-feise | Homosexuality |
| Galla | Bitch |
| Geobag | Vagina |
| Truiteag | Vagina |
| Ith mo chac! | Eat my shit! |
| Leam-leat | Two-faced, double-crossing bastard |
| Luinnseach mhor | Clumsy lump |
| Lan dhen cac | Arrogant, pompous (lit. full of shit) |
| Leodag | Flirt, cockteaser |
| Luid | Trollop, lazy slut |
| Mas | Ass, arse |
| Mo Chreach! | Goddamn! (lit. My ruin) |
| Noig | Anus |
| Raitse | Anus |
| Pòg mo thòin | Kiss my arse |
| Reipseach | Hussy |
| Sugh mo bhod | Suck my dick |
| Sput a-mach e! | Come out with it now, you idiot |
| Co rinn an samh sin? | Who made that smell? |
| Strapaid | Strumpet; a slut |
| Striopachas | Fornication, promiscuity |
| Sodomach | Sodomy |
| Tha i beag-naire | She's got no shame |
| Thalla gu Taigh na Galla | Go to hell (lit. Go to the House of the Bitch) |
| Tilg a-mach | Come, ejaculate. |
| Tolla-thon | Arse, arsehole |
| Toll-toine | Asshole |
| Thalla 's cagainn bruis | Get lost (lit: Away and chew a brush) |
| Ceann-là | Blowjob |
| Is dòcha an sin nach eil tuiteamas air bith ann? | I suppose a ride is out of the question? |
| Tha mi a' sgaoil am leathar a'faighean ràinig thu a bhàrr | I fuck the pussy you come from! |
| Rach thu agus a' sgaoil am leathar de bhur paithar | Go and fuck your sister |
| Tha thu cho duaichnidh ri èarr àirde de a' coisich deas damh | You are as ugly as the north end of a southward traveling ox |
| Bheir mi araon de do shùilean as na 'n Nach eil deoghaill anns mò ball | I will poke both your eyes out with it if you don't suck on it |
| Deoghail am fallus bhàrr duine mharbh siadha tiadhan | Suck the sweat off of a dead mans balls |
| Tha an h-a-mhàin deoc cò bod nas-fheàrr na bò mhair bò bhràmair | The only person who sucks cock better than your mum is your girlfriend |
Scottish jokes are more than just a way to tickle your funny bone—they celebrate of Scotland’s rich culture and endearing quirks. From Hogmanay humor to playful jabs at bagpipes and kilts, these jokes embody the spirit of Scotland: bold, warm, and unafraid to laugh at themselves.
So, whether you're sharing these with friends over a wee dram or breaking the ice at a ceilidh, remember that Scottish humor is best enjoyed with a twinkle in your eye and a hearty laugh. After all, as the Scots say, “Laughter is Scotland’s second national treasure—right after whisky, of course!”
Slàinte mhath! – Good health!
Slàinte mhòr! – Great health!
Slàinte is deoch-slàinte! – Health and a drinking-health!